Linty Lent

In observation of Lent a number of my friends have opted to abstain from certain pleasures and/or vices for the next 40 days (excluding Sundays - those observing Sundays are doing so for 46 days.) Some in preparation for the Easter season and others for the simple purpose of practicing self control. In the past I've "given up" soda, juice, fast food, junk food, meat and swearing among other things, but I struggle with the reality that, for me, the Lenten sacrifices of my past have done little to...well...bear fruit. These 40 days (for a Catholic) are supposed to remind us of the 40 days Jesus spent in the desert fasting and resisting temptation (which brings to mind one of my favorite Adult Swim shows ever.. which isn't anywhere in the ballpark of Biblically accurate... some might even say it's blasphemous...but... still... hilarious http://video.adultswim.com/lucy-the-daughter-of-the-devil/temptasia.html) and as a result remind us of our blessings and of our strength in God.

If I'm being entirely honest with myself, more often than not, my Lenten sacrifices have reminded me that I've gained 30 pounds since I was 18 and need to go to the gym, more so than of Jesus chillin in the desert* getting good with his destiny. And by the end of the 40 days anyway, I typically gorge myself on everything I deprived myself of in one delicious sitting known as Easter brunch (and of course for the following weeks as part of uh, the Easter Season?) Any daily "meditation" on my sacrifice revolved less around the spiritual ties to the sacrifice and more on the ways I could work around my sacrifice (ie. "I gave up chocolate candy... I didn't say I gave up chocolate cake...come to my belly cake!") or how they would benefit other superficial aspects of my life (ie. "I'm giving up fast food for Lent." Thinking, "hopefully that'll help me drop a size.") I felt like I was missing the point of Lenten observation. I know I should give up those silly little vices year round simply because that's what's good for me and not because it will make me a more complete person.

So this year, in keeping with the standard Catholic practice, I'm fasting and abstaining from meat on Fridays, but in an attempt to refocus my energies during the season of Lent, I'm tiptoeing out of my comfort zone (a zone that I'm still grappling with as I write this blog) and have organized a weekly Lenten-movie night. The goal is to get together with friends each Friday to enjoy a meat-free meal and watch a critically acclaimed feature film or documentary that speaks to our spiritual side and discuss.  Some of the films would have explicitly Catholic themes and others would use allegory to relate to Catholic beliefs and general social justice teachings.  

Yeah. Discuss religion?  With friends?  Who are not necessarily Catholic?  Who are not necessarily even theists?  This is my definition of awkward - don't know why - but it is.  The occasional blog is one thing, but discussion in person and unsolicited outside of Church functions goes against almost everything it means to be a cradle-Catholic.  I mean we might accidentally start talking about serious ISSUES here.  We might disagree! This could be a Pandora's box and the friend I've known for 14 years might suddenly decide I'm a total idiot. OH THE ANXIETY!

Luckily I have good friends... who humor me. And I know that when we do disagree, it will only make the discussion and the development that much richer... because they are nice and smart.

BTW....The invitation is open to anyone who is interested - message me or e-mail me and I'll give you the weekly details and weblink to the movie list so you can see what we're watching. It's a no-commitment invitation as I'd be doing this by myself if no one else ever showed up.

In any case, last Friday was the first of our screenings as we watched the documentary film, "Mother Teresa" I wasn't sure what to expect, as I had never seen it, but Siskel and Ebert gave it 2 thumbs up, so I was hoping it would be good.

It was.

I didn't know much about the incredible work of Mother Teresa, but the film has had me reflecting ever since on the things she said, the way she worked and the life she's led. Without a political swing, with no ulterior motives and with only the aid of "Divine Providence," she moved across the globe doing whatever she could do as a person to bring joy and love to those most forgotten among us, one person at a time. Her ideas so simple and honest. So seemingly easy for us to apply in our lives that it's almost embarrassing that I hadn't focused on it before. For example - one of the more personally thought provoking things she spoke of in the film:

"There is a terrible hunger for love. We all experience that in our lives - the pain, the loneliness. We must have the courage to recognize it. The poor you may have right in your own family. Find them. Love them."

It was exactly the type of film I had hoped it would be - and it sparked a chain of thoughts and reflection that I hadn't experienced in previous Lenten endeavors.  After the film, we initially all just talked about how amazing her life was and how simple and direct the way she worked was - no fundraisers, no advertising, no discrimination - just person to person love and acceptance.  The thought process continued even after we left that night and I haven't been able to stop thinking about it since. I'm not sure if it did the same for everyone else that watched, but I hope it did.  Mike and I have been talking about it and coming back to it as a point of discussion a number of times over the past few days... much more thought happening than when I gave up soda.

If you've got any good movies that sparked that spiritual side of you - let me know.  I'm looking for more!  I'm trying to stay away from movies that are cheeseball watered down stuff that we may have had to watch in High School religion classes and really want to watch well made films so I have mostly put together the viewing list by cross checking high customer ratings on Amazon with Roger Ebert's reviews and picking only his 3 star or higher reviewed films when available. So far, so good.

Atomic Mischief

I love the possibilities that lie within the impossible.

I just read: “Sheldrake has also demonstrated in a number of studies that we can assist each other’s learning across distances, without any external interaction or communication. In one study, for instance, a group of individuals completed a newly created crossword puzzle, and their average completion times were recorded. The same puzzle was then broadcast to millions via TV, for the viewers at home to complete. Subsequently, a new group, who had not seen the puzzle at all, finished it significantly faster than the original group, suggesting that as a result of so many individuals having done the puzzle, knowledge of the puzzle was somehow etched into the field of collective consciousness, making it increasingly easier for others to solve.”

First off, this means you are all at fault for me not being a genius already - but that's not what I'm writing about.

Back when I was in school the simple explanation of matter was that it exists and you can't destroy it or create new matter - you can only change it's form. In the last few years scientists believe they've been able to create new particles which is new, different and exciting... but wasn't "possible" when I was a student. (Possibility in the impossible!)

Anyway, almost everything I've learned about science came from high school text books, Bill Nye The Science Guy, the Discovery Channel, and the Science Channel. I'm no science wiz. If I remember things correctly, I'm not the same thing now as the thing I was when I was born - atomically speaking - the structures are all the same, but the atoms are constantly changing. All the things I eat and breathe mix and mingle with my body sharing it's carbon, hydrogen, oxygen, iron, sodium, potassium, lithium, calcium, and sulfur atoms and they dance together and rotate in and out with the atoms my bones and organs. I convert the atoms I need to live and I get rid of the atoms I'm not using on a second by second basis.

Stay with me here because I have a point.

WHAT IF all these atoms had some kind of "memory" - kind of like a muscle memory. You know, like when your body remembers how to do something even if you haven't done it in years. So what if atoms have a "muscle memory" and they remember what it was like to be part of say, Einsteins brain, and once they wiggle themselves over and out and into grass or air or snot they wiggle themselves back into someone's brain and they have a "muscle memory" of a tiny part of what they did the last time they found themselves in a brain. They could also find themselves mixed into that brain with say an old atom from Galileo's brain and they're both like, hey, I've done this before and bam, Einstein-Galileo brain hybrid moment and voila, brilliance.

So my point.

This is my pseudo-scientific explanation of why there's movies that come out at around the same time with similar premises or similar characters. Case studies - Saving Private Ryan & The Thin Red Line, Deep Impact & Armageddon, Antz & A Bug's Life, Volcano &. Dante's Peak, Gordy & Babe (also, it appears the late 90's was big on Hollywood's atomic subconscious being all in a tangle) The Illusionist & The Prestige, Paul Blart Mall Cop & Observe and Report, Million Dollar Baby & Cinderella Man, there are plenty more I am sure.

It's the atoms.

The folks in Hollywood were all eating and breathing the same atoms in different cycles so the atoms got all up in their brains and were like, dude - Volcano movie - trust me. Within days that same atom had worked its way through the brains of studio execs and production staff so they all thought - dude, Volcano movie - so they did it and thought it was a new and brilliant idea. Until they realize they'd been had by their very own ATOMS!

And that's why you never trust what an atom tells you. They have no allegiance to your brain and are basically smearing the same ideas all over the collective subconscious. It's not your fault. And that's why this theory is likely neither new or unique - because I bet a rebellious atom plugged itself into my subconscious and told me to write about it - it's already told some of the others. Maybe the atom is part of the resistance and is trying to get awareness out about what those other radical new-idea-movie-killing atoms have been doing because he's tired of being expected to watch the same movie twice. Jerks.

Sigh.

(It's been a long day. I think this blog is further evidence of my need for a nap... I think I'll be filing this theory next to my "Seaweed As Evil Alien Species" theory in my ever expanding file of awesome-and-totally -possible-if-I-was-in-charge-of-everything-in-the-universe cabinet.)

ComicCon International 2009 - Day 1 & 2

Right at this moment Mike and I are sitting in an outdoor winding line for a Battlestar Galactica panel with the cast and crew of BSG at the San Diego Convention Center. Thanks to Google, we've got free wi-fi here at Comic-Con, so I finally have a moment to blog.

We arrived on Wednesday for the preview night where, as 4 day registrants, we could get our access badges and take a peek at the insane exhibit hall a day before the single day registrants could come in and pick up some neato freebies.

Thursday, we arrived at the convention center about 4 hours before any panels started and got in line out on the lawn behind thousands of insane Twilight fans who had camped out from the night before (hahah Marci). I really wanted to see Tim Burton's panel on his film Alice in Wonderland which luckily was the first panel up. It was totally worth it. The stuff in hall H was all in 3D HD which was amazing looking... and Alice looked FANTASTIC (along with Christmas Carol w/Jim Carrey, and TRON Legacy which looked great) and I almost peed my pants when Tim Burton brought Johnny Depp out on stage. GIRLBONER.

Sat through a bunch of other panels for movies I wasn't too interested in, sat through the Twilight which I'm pretty sure is porno for 13 year old girls and finally got to the James Cameron panel where we watched about 25 minutes of his movie Avatar in 3D which was AMAZING. Then a panel with Terry Gilliam showing clips of his film The Imaginarium of Dr. Pernasius. Terry Gilliam was rad and the movie looks super cool... so I'm set to watch movies for the next year.

The downside of these panels is that the attendees can ask questions on the mic - which in theory doesn't sound like a bad idea - except (warning, explicit lyrics ahead) for the two effing tards who got in line for EVERY EFFING PANEL and asked the most stupid dumb piece of shit questions my asshole could have thought up just so they could get their stupid ass ugly faces on the screen. Obviously I wanted to punch them. They suck. And if I run into them later at the convention, I might have to tell them how much they suck. No, don't effing cry when you ask Terry Gilliam what it was like to work with Heath Ledger you dumbass "actor studying @ San Diego State" no one wants to cast you and Tim Burton doesn't give a shit that you're an actor and you're his acting inspiration - your stupid question should not have been about what it was like to direct Johnny Depp. I want Helena Bonham Carter to crap on your face and Vern Troyer to kick you in the head. Anyway.

We finally got out of the convention center in the evening and ate at the restaurant at the base of the Hard Rock, which the SyFy channel bought for the weekend and converted into the SyFy cafe with SyFy show themed menu items. Good times.

There were not as many costumes on Thursday as when we were here last year. Today (Friday) there are a few more costumes since it's "Star Wars" day and there are storm troopers and other Star Wars themed costumes all over the place. I've been taking pictures with my fancy camera so I'll be sure to upload them soon. Mike and the other guys have seen a bunch of celebrities wandering around, but I never recognize any of them anyway. Must be a boy thing.

I'm exhausted, but having a great time and happy to not be in the office.

I've Been a Bad Bad Blogger

Ok. I've been bad. I missed Friday AND Monday blogs in June. Fail. I'll have to make up blogs in blog-cram-school over the weekend.

Plus, this blog is going to suck because I forgot what I originally wanted to write about so I'm just filling up space hoping it will come back to me.

It won't.

I cried a lot watching a movie tonight. I cry easily watching movies. I'm not regularly a crybaby but movies or TV can really get me. I totally shut down the outside world and give in. It doesn't matter if it's a terrible movie or a great movie... tug at my heartstrings with the right formula and I'll cry. Usually this involves some sort of uplifting or tragic parent-child moment... or a dog getting hurt... or a dog getting his feelings hurt. Also, if I cry, the movie can still suck big time... so my emotional involvement doesn't necessarily mean I like the movie. (Case and point "Harry Potter and The One Where That Kid Dies and His Dad Cries." That was the official title, right? Hate that movie.)

Tonight I watched "Ma Vie En Rose" (not to be confused with "La Vie En Rose") about a seven year old kid with a gender identity crisis growing up in a very loving family that just has no idea how to deal with his issues. It was portrayed so realistically with characters that you could easily identify with. Anyway, this isn't a movie review but it moved me to tears and I still liked the movie.

There are movies that make me cry so much that I can never watch again (The Green Mile, Dumbo and Glory. If you need me to explain, I will.) There are movies that I'm embarrassed to admit they made me cry (Anchor Man) and movies I cried in that I'm bitter I wasted my tears on (probably too many for me to list.)

So, tomorrow, I will have puffy swollen eyelids - which will suck. I love how red and plump my lips get when I cry... why can't they stay like that for a day after crying and my eyelids go down to normal? So lame.